I don’t update much anymore. In fact, I cant really remember the last time I was able to sit down and write. It’s been a long struggle and I’ve been trying to force myself to come up with some story that will captivate the audience in which I entertain. Truth is? I got lazy. I fell into self pity, self indulgence and just flat out selfishness. My days have been filled with mostly catching up on work, feeding my virtual world by “Pinning” images that I, 1. Wont be able to afford. 2. Will never have the body or look like the super model. 3. Foreign places that look calm and peaceful that I cant afford to travel too. 4. Recipes that I most likely wont get to, because I’ll be “Pinning” more. 5. Outfits that depress me because I don’t own 90% of it, and cant afford 100% of it. Last but not least 6. Words of insults or snarky-ness that give me a bad attitude towards life.
Why in the world I fall into the indulgence of such material is mind blowing. Since my most recent birthday, Ive been experiencing many epiphanies. I don’t want to live in a surreal world where people make inspiration boards of things and/or places they’ll never get to. I don’t want to waste the little time on earth that I have “talking about my dreams”! No, I want to start living my dreams and I started with today…..
I woke up early, TOO early, and so did Jared. I was extremely restless for it only being 4:30am, must have been the tiramisu we ate before we went to bed. We decided to go ahead and crawl out of bed and make some coffee. Jared went about his abnormal morning routine by relaxing to a few games of the new annoyance known as, Call Of Duty (go ahead and hate on me, I said it). I took to the couch with my warm blanket and cup of piping hot coffee. Church didn’t start for another 6 hours so what in the world was I going to do? Especially so early in the morning. So….I got on Facebook, then Pinterest, then Facebook again, then my fitness blogs. Next thing I know Ive spent 3 hours on the computer. DOING NOTHING. How COMPLETELY self indulgent am I to be wasting so much time looking at useless material- or people complaining about the weather, Christmas budgets, or how cute their baby is?
I felt worthless. I literally accomplished nothing. Learned nothing new. Created nothing new. Nothing.
Then it dawned on me, START LIVING. Get off the couch, shut down the computer and START LIVING. I hopped out of my comfortable blankey, threw on my warmest PJ’s and grabbed my hubby in tow. “We’re having church at the dam today at sunrise” I proclaimed loudly to Jared. His response was nothing unexpected. “Whhaaaa?? Its like, cold outside!!!!” “We’ll grab coffee and keep each other warm. We’re never up at this time of day, lets take advantage of it!!”
So we rushed out the door- sun rising quickly mind you- and began scraping our windows…sun still rising quickly!! Once we were able to somewhat safely see the road we took off to Tim Hortons.
Crap, we forgot our wallet. We had to rush back home and quickly grab some cash, SUN STILL RISING! By this point, we could almost see the top of the sun peeking up over the horizon, I was thinking we weren’t going to make it. Its perfect timing for an inconvenience like this to arise when we’re already pressed for time. We ordered our coffee and sped to the dam, all while I had my favorite praise and worship songs playing, keeping me calm and at peace. The beginning was CHAOTIC, but we finally reached the dam, just in time to see the sun fully rise over the tree line.
This wasn’t enough for me. I needed to get out, I needed to walk the path that led me into the bright warm light. I needed to be refreshed. And I was….
I had such joy, such excitement and such LIFE!
I went out and lived, I saw the morning frost on the rock bed, I crouched by the water to take in the smell of the fog that rose from it glass-like stillness, I ran to the dam to HEAR the sound of the waterfall.
I LIVED IT.
I threw my arms into the air, faced the bright sun, shut my eyes and thanked GOD for creating such magnificence for us to enjoy. And what beauty he has created in my own backyard…..